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Archive for July, 2014

bye, okay?

The silence around Prairietown lately has been the result of needing to send things out to journals rather than posting them here myself. I love sticking an essay or a string of thoughts up on my blog and moving on–knowing that those who want to read the post can and know where to find it (and that I can also find their internet writings, which more often than not do not appear under the banner of a literary journal). But I have the common writer-problem of needing to accumulate numbers and names in order to acquire legitimacy in order to publish a book.

I’m grateful when a journal decides to publish something of mine. And it’s exciting to think I’m one step closer to publishing my book (and helpful to believe that this is the case). But seeing one of my stories in a magazine–cut off from the linked collection to which it belongs–is not the goal. And maybe one of the reasons I find this publication process so dissatisfying is that it was never the goal to publish anything; the goal has already been met. I have little desire to look back on these stories or see them in print. They were a puzzle that I solved as well as I could; they are done. I’m working on a new puzzle now–a new book. At the same time, I need to try to find a way to finance these games–which, unlike most other games, I find so absorbing, so natural, so complete in themselves. That ask more of me than anything. That I love more than anything. When I can, I post little updates at my writing journal, Plague Dawgs.

This is sad for me. Sadder than I had expected.  xoxo

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